A Thinly Drawn Veil
by EAnnajeRETURNS
Summary: Hermione might belong to Black in law, but her blood sang in his veins, and his magic was melded to hers. No matter where she went or who they became, they belonged to each other. And he would give up everything to remind her of that.
1. Everything Turns

_Previously, in:_

**A DARKLY SLANTED MIRROR**

_James Potter only wanted what any decent Wizard could hope for, a bloody gorgeous wife, three brats and his three best mates close by. He didn't expect to catch a Witch from the skies or to fall in love with her haunted honey eyes._

_Hermione woke up broken and alone in front of Potter Manor, with no memory of her past life, but an infinite well of knowledge at her disposal. Her one solace quickly became not only her love for the determined and free spirited James Potter, but all of the Marauders._

_She has been given a new name and the family she senses she has always craved, but fears digging too deeply into her past. Little does she realize that the scars on her hand are the mark of her time turner, or that she comes from more than twenty years in the future. Nor does she realize the impact her presence has already had on those around her, how she's helped forge and break relationships. Or how prophecy and history is now being rewritten._

_The Dark Lord is on the rise, and Hermione is determined to do whatever it takes to save the ones she loves. James will stop at nothing to keep her or to remind her that true love is worth fighting for at all costs._

_Sides will be chosen and friendships divided in the sequel and conclusion to "A Darkly Slanted Mirror._"

* * *

**A THINLY DRAWN VEIL**

* * *

**PART 3: Hogwarts**

**Chapter 1**

**Everything Turns**

* * *

It was a decidedly frigid morning, when the Hogwarts students arrived at King's Cross and gathered together on Platform 9¾. Steam hissed as it escaped from the train waiting on the nearby tracks. Hogwarts Express was filled with a wary assembly of young Wizards and Witches, some oblivious to the increasing darkness of their world. Still others looked at their classmates and families with suspicious expressions. Most wore some form of Wizarding robe, even many of Muggles. The few dressed in Muggle jeans and jumpers didn't notice the dark glares from the more finely dressed crowd overlooking the proceedings.

The date was January twelfth, 1977 and even here with the bustle of baggage crow of magical pets and shouts of children, the fear on this platform this day was tremulous.

Or so thought Sirius Orion Black as he escorted his best mate's Witch through the crowd. Hermione was wearing the Dumbledore phoenix crest around her neck proudly today, contrary to her usual timidity. He was used to seeing her duck and hide from the calculating eyes of the Snakes. But they had discussed their strategy at length with Reggie the weekend before, and under the Black brothers' urging, Hermione Dumbledore was coming out of the cupboard. She was going to play the part that Dorea established for her, to charm and dazzle her Housemates. And hopefully, Reggie had said, pull the bloody wool over all of their eyes.

Lately he felt like he had been leading a life in that Muggle Telly show Moony was obsessed with, "The Twilight Zone." Ever since they were quite loudly kicked off Potter grounds, they had made their home with Uncle Alphard at his estate on the fringes of upper class London.

They had at last visited Grimmauld Place together and with each visit, Walburgha seemed to warm to the idea of them together. Not like the Dragon could ever be described as loving and affectionate. But Hermione assured him that she had an understanding with the Black matron, and didn't mind watching him spending his time playing Wizarding chess with Grandfather in the library.

Hermione and he had been about as happy as could be expected when parted from their best mates and the love of her life. Sirius couldn't recall a time when he hadn't talked with Prongs. From the owls Mooney frequently sent back and forth, he learned James wasn't taking this well at all. Rumor had it, his former best mate had spent most of his time in the skies, or with Mummy P and the other two Marauders. Pete hadn't quite understood the rift between their group until James literally exploded in his face about it. Sirius passed this on to Hermione, but he didn't tell her everything. He didn't mention how James was disappearing from the house on odd errands, or that Professor Dumbledore had been over more often than usual.

Remus was worried that James was "getting involved," though what exactly that entailed, he was afraid to know.

Hermione received a visit and several owls from the Headmaster, herself, but declined a return to her uncle's home. She told him that her place was at Sirius' side, now.

And he didn't know why that made him feel so sad, yet joyful at the same time. He hadn't felt like he was ever going to get the things he wanted out of life. Not because he had stopped wanting them, but because he knew he didn't deserve them. Try as Prongs, Moony and Mummy P had, nothing could get rid of the truth he knew in his head. He was a terrible Wizard who was raised to do terrible things. So he fought that darkness more than anyone else in his House, or among his acquaintance. And it was this struggle that drew him to Hermione.

Reggie gave them a silent nod as they passed by the Slytherin crowd. Sirius placed a hand over hers, currently clinging to his elbow. While outwardly she was the picture of confident, strength, inside she was a mess.

He'd taken her for a ride on his pride and joy the night before, just to help calm her nerves. While originally Hermione seemed to fear heights, since the night James had kicked them out of Potter Manor, she craved the thrill. He knew the feeling. It was one of the reasons he wanted a motorbike in the first place, after running away from Grimmauld Place.

_How the fucking wheel has turned,_ he thought to himself as he glared back at the Snakes. Half of them were his relatives. He couldn't very well smile at them just yet. They weren't his mates and they never would be. Just because he was back in training to be the next Black heir, did not mean he had to suck up to those cock blocked wankers.

They made it onto the train without incident, until the Head Boy appeared at the opposite end of their car. Hermione's grip tightened until he felt like his circulation was about to cut off.

Sirius beamed immediately when he saw Prongs. He couldn't help it. They were blood brothers, after all, bonded in a different, but just as strong, way as Hermione. Or so Sirius, in his ignorance, believed.

"Oi!" he shouted, over the heads and curious faces of several Fourth and Second years. "Prongs, mate! It's about time you showed up."

For a moment James's expression lightened and the bespectacled Wizard seemed to contemplate coming to meet them. But that was when his gaze shifted to Hermione and immediately blackened. Without nodding to acknowledging them further, James slid open a cart just before having to cross paths and ducked inside.

Sirius stared, stunned at the space his best mate left behind. He admitted then to himself that in spite of what happened and all Moony said, things would be different when they met in person, better. He could barely speak or think as frustration and depression loomed over his head.

_Seriously need a fag right now..._

"Come on, Padfoot," Hermione softly said, pulling on his arm as she led him further down the train.

They glanced in at the car where James had been meeting with the Prefects. Lily was already waiting in the compartment just beside it. Her owl had told them she would meet them there the night before. They weren't expecting to find McKinnon, Binns, Eddie Underhill, Sasparilla Ashwood, Wilfred Smythe and Zephania Smith were already packed together in the seats and waiting.

Sirius frowned as something itched at the back of his mind, like this group, these people were somehow significant. He knew it for certain when Hermione gasped and clenched his arm again. He barely had room to shut the door behind them.

_Merlin's tatty drawers, I'm gonna need a new arm after this!_

Lily smiled warmly up at them and then addressed the others, "I think we all know why we're here." The others nodded and exchanged faint smiles.

Hermione at last nodded and spoke as if catching her breath. "You lot were in Hogsmeade, the day James and I..."

Sirius, who was known for having a minute by minute child's attention span, stopped staring at her breasts and honed in on her words. He felt like pieces of a puzzle were clicking together for him, but the picture wasn't quite clear yet. So he kept quiet, something he was becoming good at, being back in the Black Family's favor.

Marlene interrupted with that Scottish accent that drove Pete crazy, "Hermione, don't worry. Evans has shared a good bit with us already. We've all been looking out for you two since what happened. And we're not just here because you saved our lives, but because we think you might be the only one powerful enough to stop..._You-Know-Who_."

Hermione sputtered, "What?!" All her carefully schooled Slytherin graces went out with the rest of the shit, then. "Why would you think I was powerful? You're all just as clever as me," she said, her olive skin turning pink as she told an obvious fib.

Sirius couldn't help the roll of his eyes or his huff of amusement as he mumbled, "Godric's balls, Mione..."

Hermione slapped him and continued, without missing a beat. "Whatever you might think, or have seen or even heard, I'm nobody special. I'm even less than what you want me to be..." she murmured and he knew she was referring to the fact no one else in this room but him knew.

Sasparilla Ashwood piped up then, her pale blonde hair gleaming in the winter light peeking through the window. "But you're Dumbledore's _niece, _Hermione."

Binns added, "Yeah, and you're the brightest Witch in Hogwarts, besides. Even my Great-Great-Great-Great Grandad says so!"

Lily calmed them down when they began talking over one another. When he felt Hermione tense he rubbed his thumb absently over her hand, until she calmed again. He felt like this was his toughest but likewise, easiest job these days, keeping Hermione safe. That included keeping her from a bunch of hero-worshiping brats, pushing her into even more danger.

Lily finally shouted, "Shut it!" and smiled faintly when they turned to her with wide eyes. "Look, Hermione, we're not trying to force you into anything. But we wanted you to know that you have allies this year, eyes and ears in all the Houses. And when the time comes, they'll be ready for whatever you decide to do."

Hermione nodded after a while and said, "I-I guess I should thank you. Just...look after Ja-Potter when you can. Things are a bit more complicated and he might...Well, never mind that. Just keep an eye on Slytherin and if any of you hear anything, you know how to contact me," she finished.

Sirius tried to hold in his laugh as Lily ushered them out of the room.

"Remember to keep your coins on you at all times," Lily encouraged as they nodded and hugged and shook her hand.

Hermione shifted uneasily when the Second Year, Wilfred Smythe, actually _bowed_ to her. And then they were alone.

Sirius and Hermione took their seats across from the red-headed Witch and he watched, again silently, before he burst, "Okay, what the _hell _was that about, Evans?"

Lily narrowed her startling green eyes at him, "_That _was part of the plan, Black. Though why Regulus let _you _take over his part in it, I'll never understand. You're about as subtle as a bull in a china cupboard."

Hermione's worried frown broke into a slight smirk. This encouraged Sirius to continue their little debate, as long as it distracted her from her fear.

"You're just jealous you don't get a piece of _this _action, Evans," he told her, batting his eyelashes at her.

"I don't know how you put up with his mucking about, Hermione," she said with disdain. Lily pulled a disgusted face, shaking her head so her straight, dark red hair flew out of her face. "Now listen. I know Potter is royally pissed with you two, but I'm sure he'll eventually come round again. Especially once he realized you two aren't in it for keeps."

Hermione linked her fingers together, occasionally twitching enough that Sirius could feel the pressure of her restrained magic. He glanced at her as she replied.

"I would have liked some sort of warning before you brought the others into this...but what are the coins you were mentioned?" She leaned forward, almost eagerly as Evans answered.

"Oh that! I had this idea of charming these coins so they'll let everyone know when and where to meet for meetings."

"Meetings?" Sirius asked.

Lily nodded and continued, as if talking about the bloody weather. "Yeah, we need some way to convene quickly."

"Convene?" Hermione said and then frowned. "Lily, I'm trying to keep a low profile, not start a revolution under Uncle Albus's nose."

Sirius added, "She's right! Are you fuckin' mental, Evans? Seriously, do you think the Snakes won't notice us disappearing off school grounds?"

_Or James since he's still got the map...need to make sure Moony keeps it this term._

Lily looked between them for a long pause. "Look, I'm not forcing anything on you, either of you," she reluctantly said. "Black, you know the dangers she's under more than most. We all have to be more careful than ever, now that we're divided. I can't even be seen with Sev in public."

Sirius held up his hands and felt nauseous, "Ugh! For the love of Salazar's loins, _please _don't finish that. What I don't get is how he turned you over to the dark side..."

"I could say the same thing about you, Black!" Lily snapped.

Hermione put her hand over his, so her fingers brushed over his family ring. He could feel the tingle from the light magical bond the contract had already linked them. It was enough to shut him up.

"I'm glad we have allies, and I appreciate everything you and Snape and Regulus have done for me," Hermione said. "But Sirius is right. People are going to be curious and they're going to be watching. Not just at Hogwarts, but the Death Eaters as well. I haven't even told Uncle Albus everything, to protect him."

"Exactly," Lily announced. "And since you can't play the role you wanted, we'll be your eyes and ears. We'll deal with the Death Eaters and this time you'll know long before _You-Know-Who_ decides to show his ugly face."

Sirius sighed as they made plans for the school term. He didn't think it was a good idea bringing more people into their mess, but Evans actually had a good point. And as their conversation died and plans of his own began to formulate in his head, Sirius opened his arm to draw Hermione closer. He vowed to himself that he wasn't going to let anything happen to her. But this time, though he didn't admit it, his reasons had nothing to do with James.

* * *

The Welcome Feast was hell, in Remus John Lupin's humble opinion. He could feel the angst and anger reeling off his pack members throughout most of it. He had gone from blessed peace and quiet to constant noise and scents, his Werewolf senses were tingling from things he had no control over.

Sirius and Hermione were sitting together at the Slytherin table, not because he wanted to. Remus knew Padfoot didn't trust most of the Snakes and half of them were his bloody relatives. But it did save them the trouble of facing James.

He glanced up from his meal while Dumbledore droned on about the usual spring term shite. Usually he would have been listening with rapt attention, eager to soak in these last vestiges of his education. Remus knew he wasn't going to be pursuing any studies after this. His _condition _made impossible so many things the rest of them took for granted. Nobody would keep an employee requiring nearly a week's absence out of every month. And even if they did, soon as they realized it was a recurring thing, it wouldn't take them long to put two and two together. Then he was good as locked up in Azkaban for some crime he didn't commit, or cast out on the streets. And he couldn't be a burden to his parents forever...

"Moony?" James hissed across the table, drawing his surprised attention. His best mate, the one who first learned of his condition and still made him an honorary brother, was watching him with mild concern. Remus wasn't expecting to see _that _James.

Lately Prongs had been a constant flux of change, determined and hopeful one second and prideful and furious the other. He could see the shadows hidden by his friend's spectacles and his hair was even more windblown than usual. He had no doubt Gryffindor was going to win it this year, with all the practice their captain was putting into it.

James grinned, though it never reached his eyes and added, "You're making Wormy nervous, you know."

Pete paused in his desert with his mouth hung open and crumbs spilling with his reply, "Oi! Am not!"

"Shhh!" several heads turned their direction.

Remus was embarrased and when he looked at the podium, the Headmaster's twinkling gaze was fixed on _him_. Sheepishly he gulped and cast a harsh glare at the other two, before returning his focus to where it ought to be.

The Headmaster's voice carried though he seemed to speak with little effort. "I have no doubt, that many of you have heard of the horrifying attacks over the holidays. I regret to inform you that two of your classmates have not returned this term, due to this. But let me assure you, though the world is locked in this season of death, the ice always cracks and life will return. The sun will beat back the shadows and we shall do all in our power to keep you safe. And keep in mind, it is our choices that define who we are, not our abilities."

Remus grimaced, disturbed by the Headmaster's words. He lifted his gaze then and across the hall, met a pair of golden, amber shaded orbs that were just as wide and concerned as him. He smiled faintly at Hermione and then rolled his eyes when Sirius leaned in front of her to make a face and a rude gesture. It was a game they had played since Second Year actually, so he made the answering signal back without thought.

"Easy there mate," James laughed, holding up his hands. "I wasn't trying to get you in trouble, y'know."

Remus glared at his oldest friend. "I don't know if I feel like carrying out Plan 753 after all..."

Peter choked on his drink and James slapped him on the back, answering, "C'mon Moony! Don't be so pissy, you old furball. You just looked like death had walked over your grave. And you've been doing such a bully job keeping me sane. Can't have you going mad too. Then what would poor Wormtail do?"

Peter shook his head to himself, mumbling words James couldn't hear. But his Werewolf senses understood clearly. "_Barmy git, kicking Mione out of the house...of course you're mad..."_

Remus hid his smile behind his hand and looked up through his eyelashes to watch James. He was expecting a sharp retort and some more fun before Prongs gave up. But, yet again, the new James Merlin Potter had lost his thoughts to _she-who-must-not-be-named_, and had a morose, pained expression on his face. It came and went so quickly when Frank Longbottom turned to ask him something about Prefect patrols, that Remus knew he wasn't going to make it to the rendezvous point.

_She'll have to owl me about it later,_ he thought with a slight grimace. It was far better to stay and keep an eye on James and the Marauder's Map, after all.

Soon as his best mate was finished, he stood and spread open his hands, "Well, what are we waiting for? To work, gents," he said.

James's hazel eyes lit with new life.

* * *

"Shh!" Remus ordered.

"But he's stepping on my foot, Mooney!" Pete whinged.

James started laughing until Remus elbowed him in the chest.

"You want to try brewing this potion next go around? I didn't think so. Now, come on. These charms won't last and the elves aren't brainless like _you two_."

James used his wand to open the portrait of fruit and the three, "Ready? One...Two..."

"What happened to three?" Pete peeped before Remus shoved him in the kitchens.

As they had suspected, the kitchens were empty and only one House Elf remained at the fireside, mindlessly snapping its fingers whenever the flames began to die.

Remus tensed, and prayed the silencing charm would work. Elves weren't stupid and could see through Wizarding magic, if they were aware of it. If they pulled this off the right way, there wouldn't be any hiccups. Otherwise, this could get _very _messy.

James turned to him from underneath his dad's invisibility cloak and nodded with a sloppy side-grin. They moved a huddled mass. After years of sneaking undetected under this thing, they had the skills of a bloody ballerina. And he had to admit it was easier without Padfoot making lewd jokes on purpose to make them laugh.

They passed the tables and endless pots and pans until they reached it. The pipes were twisting, rollicking things and Remus hoped this would lead to the Elf quarters and not Wizard and Witches instead. Everything depended on that.

"Ready?" He said, as he waved his wand and whispered the spell he'd found over break at Potter Manor.

Peter handed him the heavy glass of Firewhisky solemnly and James's grin turned devious as Remus smirked back. They began to pour the amber liquid into the open valve.

* * *

Hermione Dumbledore was hoping Remus could make it to their meeting. But when he didn't show, Sirius urged her on, promising, "Moony always has a good reason. Better than most, trust me, love."

She sighed and let him lead her down deeper into the dungeons. "I just miss him, them...you know."

"Yeah," he sighed heavily and eyed her. "But at least you've got me, yeah? Remember what I told you the other night? We're in this together, Mione, love. Don't be forgetting that having _this _Black on your side is better than any brand of magic."

She smiled at the mirrored sorrow in his beautiful gray eyes. "I believe you," she said, and she meant it. Sirius had been something of a slight thorn in her side, a twitch in her eye before this. She wasn't sure what she was supposed to say or how she should treat him more often than not. She couldn't ever pinpoint what her reasons for this were, for her discomfort around him. Likewise, he made her feel safe. He had turned his life upside down for no more reason than to help her and James. And she was even learning to like flying.

_A motorbike really is much safer than a stick and straw, anyhow,_ she thought.

Sirius staggered then, hand on his heard and tugging her to the floor with him. "Sirius Black!" she screeched and then fell half on top of him against the nearby wall.

"Sorry, love, can't breathe!" he gasped beneath her, eyes crossing and staring up at the ceiling "You...you actually admitted you trust anything _I _have to say?"

"Sirius," Hermione gasped and struggled to right him, "You'd better stop before I hex you!"

"But you know everything, Mione, love," he said, suddenly straightening and winking at her, followed by his most winning smirk.

Hermione blushed and hit him with her fist. "I take it back. You're such a slimy toad sometimes, Black. I don't know why I ever agreed to marry you..." Both of their smirks faded and a brief, awkward pause ensued.

Sirius, never one for awkward pauses he had not initiated, said, "Why don't you sneak me into the Slytherin girls' dorms tonight, yeah? I'd love to see the looks on their faces when I turn up in the shower tomorrow morning."

Hermione rolled her eyes and slapped his arm again. They eased as they came to the door Lily marked for them. The rune was invisible until she approached it. "Speak friend and enter," she mumbled to herself fondly.

"What?" Sirius barked.

"Shh! Shut up a moment so I can concentrate." She shut her eyes and waved her wand. It was a farce really, because she was channeling her magic through her other hand. Her wand was ancient and far too powerful. And she was so much better at nonverbal wandless spells.

"Merlin's balls," Sirius mumbled as they entered.

The old classroom had been converted to something that resembled a common room. Lily and Severus had transfigured couches and chairs and the candles were warm and inviting. All dust and cobwebs had been cleared and Hermione blushed slightly when she eyed the bed at the far corner.

This time she was relieved that the only ones meeting them were Snape, Evans and Regulus. The latter lifted his calculating sapphire eyes to her with a smirk eerily reminiscent of his brother.

"Hermione!" Lily exclaimed and jumped up. She was dressed down, her robe tossed aside in favor of Muggle jeans and a jumper. Hermione was thrown off when the taller red-head wrapped her up in a tight hug, and she felt something that should not have been there.

Her mouth opened and she parted only to stare fixed on Lily's belly. Instantly, she reached out and brushed against the tiny being growing inside her and was even more startled to feel a knowing touch of magic reach back. "Lily..."

Lily blanched, obviously not expecting this reaction.

Sirius frowned, "What's going on? Why do you look like you've seen Professor Slughorn in a bikini, love?"

"Always the joker," Regulus commented snidely.

Severus added, "Indeed, but we mustnt' expect anything of real intelligence to come from his mouth, after all."

"You're right. Unfortunately, my brother's mouth always _did _get in the way of his brain," Regulus said with a smirk.

"I'm warning you Reggie! You piss me off or let _that _one rub me the wrong way and I'm gone."

Severus sighed, "Again, Black, you prove your oozing intelligence by making threats and ultimatums. If you're ever to blend in with your family, perhaps you should _listen _to your brother."

Sirius clenched his fists, but his wand hand stilled when Hermione instinctively reached out to stop him. "Oi! Did you not just hear him, love?"

"I'm pregnant, okay?" Lily said.

Hermione nodded, having expected as much, but her fiancee clearly had not.

"What the _fuck_, Evans?!"

"Sirius!" Hermione hissed and then, wordlessly, cast a silencing spell on him. He continued to shout and motion with his hands but she returned her gaze to the Witch before her.

"Thanks," Lily said, wringing her hands. The taller Witch turned to walk back over to the empty spot beside Severus. "Look, you were gonna find out soon anyway, so you might as well know now. I'm using charms to block it, and it should be enough until we graduate. Unless someone hugs me the wrong way." She frowned and glanced up at Severus, who met her with adoring eyes.

Hermione didn't know whether to be more surprised by this news or the fact Snape looked ready to spout sonnets. "I see...well, congratulations. I know this time is not _ideal_, but a baby is always a reason to celebrate." She smiled and then nodded firmly, confident that she was right. Her words made Lily smile broadly in return.

When she lifted the silencing charm on Sirius, he was out of breath and simply staring back and forth between Lily and Severus in shock. She patted his arm. "Come, sit down before you hurt yourself."

Regulus chuckled, earning a pointed glare from his elder brother.

Lily shared one more look with Severus before beginning, "So, now that we're all here, I thought you might want to know the real reason I contacted you."

"Obviously you think I'm important, or you wouldn't have formed a club of my...supporters," she admitted, awkwardly. She still didn't like the thought of students blindly following her, when she had done nothing _real _to earn their trust.

Regulus took over for Lily. "This was their idea at first, you know, to find a way to protect you from the Death Eaters. And of course, as you know Severus and I are just a sampling of the latest recruits," he said darkly.

Hermione's heart ached as she saw a flicker of his disappointment and fear. He masked it so well, but she remembered he was nearly two years her junior.

_So young...no one should be fighting a war so young._

Lily sat forward in her seat and smiled. "We're going to have to pretend we can't sand each other in public now you understand. Anything that ties us together makes us a target. And we've been talking lately about how we think the boys can spy for Dumbledore, perhaps. Since he's your uncle, you could speak with him about it. But not yet. The grown ups don't think we're ready for this kind of war, for fighting. But we're a part of it. You heard what the Professor said during the feast. We want to make the right choices, not just for us, but for everyone."

Hermione nodded, and wondered if Albus would agree. She thought back to the holidays and her time with the Order of the Phoenix. Did they know about it? Should she tell them? She felt like she needed to talk to Sirius alone then, unsure whether two Death Eaters needed to know so much.

_But they took a risk just coming here tonight..._

"You don't have any right asking her this," Sirius suddenly said, his voice shaking. She blinked and turned to look at him beside her. "None of you. She's in hiding, don't you understand? And the ones that tried to kill her are still out there, but you just want to puff her up and make her your fucking _chosen one_, don't you?"

Regulus bowed his head and Lily actually looked chastened, but Severus sneered at him and cut in, "Granted, you have courage, Black. But you're a fool. No one's going to attack her, because the Dark Lord _wants _her. Get that through your thick skull. _Sh__e _has faced him and survived. He wants to collect and do Merlin knows what to her. And we can't afford to let that kind of power to get into his hands."

Hermione's blood ran cold as she realized what Severus wasn't saying. He must have been there that day in Hogsmeade and probably helped to trap the other students. She shivered.

Sirius leaned forward to look her in the eye. "Look at me love, fuck them and their plans to save the world. Just _look_ at me and tell me you don't want to do this. Tell me this is too much for you and you want me to walk you to your dorm. Hermione, _please," _he whispered and covered her hand with his.

Hermione looked at him and tears blurred her vision. "No. I-I can do this, Sirius. Don't you understand? I _have _to."

* * *

**Review: If you want to :) What do you think is going to happen next? Did the Marauders succeed in spiking the House Elves water supply? ;) Stay tuned to find out. **

_**A/N**: Yay! We're back for the sequel! I hope you're all as excited as I am about this story. The answers left unsaid in A Darkly Slanted Mirror will gradually be revealed. But of course I'm going to make you work for them a bit ;) Things are certainly darker in the coming chapters, but hopefully you'll hang tight and enjoy the angsty, drama and action filled ride. Thanks to everyone who reviewed and Fav'd ADSM and followed me these past years. This sequel wouldn't be here without you :)_


	2. New Way To Bleed

**A/N: _Thanks so much to all of you who reviewed and shared your love for this ongoing saga and your suggestions and feelings. I want to especially thank Crystal, who wants Sirius to find his happy ending, Summer Leah, who couldn't wait to see what happens next and Maria F, who read ADSM and the first chap of ATDV in ONE day! _**

* * *

**PART 3: Hogwarts**

**Chapter 2**

**New Way To Bleed**

* * *

_They were running for their lives again, not that this was considered news. At least they had the locket, she reassured herself. But she was already so tired. The Polyjuice had done them little good in the long run, making her second guess her methods. Surely there was an easier way to sneak into these vaults. _

_How much easier it would have been if they hadn't needed to sneak at all. Now she was Apparating and Disapparating at alarming frequencies, to quickly for her moderate magical level to keep up. She hadn't Harry's power and at the moment, brains and cleverness weren't getting them anywhere._

_She was fading, fast…_

_She screamed when she lost control, unaware of the struggle her friends had keeping up. __They fell to the soft grassy earth so the breath was stolen from her lungs. She struggled to breathe, lifted her head against the pain clenching at her brain._

_As the hollow shell shock still ringing in her ears began to fade Hermione realized someone was screaming in agony. __Pushing her dark curls from her face she saw Harry's green eyes meet hers…and then saw the crumpled form he was holding down to the earth._

_**Splinched**…._

_Tears blurred her vision, still she concentrated on the non-verbal spell she had rehearsed so many times before their quest began. She had memorized so many spells, so many words, so many books to make certain they were prepared. She had thought of everything, every logical turn of events, every scenario._

**_Your fault…_**

_She was screaming while blood began to gush from Ron's lips…lips she had never caressed with her own. She had never known how desperately she longed to do just that until now._

_His's eyes pleaded with her in a sudden moment of lucidity past the loss of blood and his pain. There was forgiveness in his eyes, a need and sorrow, as though he knew what was inevitable. Though not knowing how they could go on, that Hermione was the one who had to do it. She had to be the one to pull Harry through…_

_It was too much. Too fast! Her other hand was grasping for the metal inside her shirt, unable to wrench it free with her weak hand._

_No time…_

_Ron's periwinkle blue eyes locked with hers for a moment, burning, suddenly coherent yet the message in them was unmistakable._

_Hermione choked, "NO!"_

_Harry's body collided with hers, his hand wrapped round her wrist, he only turned to cast a spell that caused the world to explode in a silvery blue light._

_A Patronus charm..._

_'**POP**'_

Hermione Ariana Dumbledore sat up in her bed with a gasp and a scream, her hand ripping at the fabric clothing her chest. Sweat trickled down her forehead and her chest felt strained, her breathing hoarse as though she had been running. The scars in her hand hurt with a sharp, biting pain of memory.

She glanced around the shield her curtains provided. The darkness smelled so familiar and yet different from the scent of grass, blood and magic. Already the dreams were beginning to fade from her mind, but this last one she recognized. She had been afraid to think too much of it, afraid of what it could mean. Hermione didn't recognize the scarred, frightened Witch running for her life alongside two Wizards who were still boys underneath the scars of war. She didn't want to recognize that girl and her possible link to Hermione's past.

Because she _wasn't _that girl, _couldn't _be her or belong to those memories. She was a different person, a better one, she hoped.

She whispered softly, "And you will be better, Hermione." Even if her definition of better hurt those she loved most. Even if she became some propped and prodded hero to a group of frightened teenagers. They needed her to be the heroine and that's what she intended to live up to. Even if she sacrificed her life and her happiness to do it.

Her limbs felt like lead as she shifted under her bedcovers and picked up the worn piece of parchment hiding under her pillow. She ran her fingers over it and wandlessly, emanated a soft light from the palm of her hand to better read its contents.

James had charmed this paper for her back in the Fall Term, during his quest to woo and win her, as he had called it. Then it was covered in fanciful scribbles, messages penned between and often, she suspected, during classes. Most of their secret rendezvous had been coordinated upon this magical parchment, which erased its own messages until the next was written. She had avoided looking at it, even though, as she unpacked her things in the familiar dungeon girls' dorms, she had shed fresh tears and stuffed it under her pillow.

She was afraid because the last time she had looked at this, James had written about his love for her. She feared finding a message inspired by his hatred of her.

_Could you really blame him?_

Her heart froze and clenched when she recognized a furtive, furious new scrawl. This time, it simply read,

...

_**Hermione,**_

_**I don't know who you are anymore. **_

_**Can't say I know myself any better. **_

_**Things are so fucked up right now, I don't know why I'm writing this, or if you'll ever read it. Part of me wants to murder my best friend, but I love him too much to hurt a hair on his fucking head.**_

_**Part of me wants you to feel every single second of the way I feel. At least we're in this shit together, I guess. I get that much satisfaction, every time I feel you close by. **_

_**But I can't forgive, Hermione.**_

_**Can't forgive you for trying to save me without letting me save you.**_

_**Can't forgive Sirius for being the better Wizard and seeing what everyone else obviously already knew. **_

_**Can't forgive myself most. Because I'm such a fucking asshole and I know I'm just gonna keep hurting you.**_

_**Potter**_

...

"Ow! Floor's freezing," Pervincia whinged. "Why would the house elves nick my slippers...and, where is my robe!"

"Shut it!" Desdemona hissed from her bed beside Hermione's.

Hermione bit her lip to keep from laughing when Pervincia continued to bemoan. She supposed Macbeth had grown too used to the privileges of the family castle in Scotland. As she had put it before winter break, they owned _fifty _house elves. Halfblood though she may be, no one in Slytherin denied Macbeth's family was loaded and with good reason.

And the one sure way to drive Lefay spare was to bitch and moan anytime before noon.

Shoving the letter back under her pillow and whispering a hex over the paper for prying eyes, Hermione paused and took in a deep, calming breath. After ending the spell lighting her palm, she threw open her emerald curtains and welcomed her roommates. Her eyes widened at the sight before her.

Desdemona was sneering and glaring from her bed at Pervincia, the latter who was searching in vain for her misplaced robe and slippers.

"I simply _can't _start classes like this! Mione!" her large blue eyes landed on the unfortunate Witch.

Hermione narrowed her eyes on Desdemona when she heard her snort. The pale Lefay only arched an eyebrow of amusement as Pervincia flooded her hearing and vision.

"Hermione, you _have _to help me. Those house elves have bodged everything!"

"Calm down, Pervincia, I'm sure its nothing," Hermione offered. But when they inspected the rest of their belongings, they realized it wasn't just Macbeth who was having trouble. Many objects had been traded in for utensils, clothes obviously belonging to other houses.

Their other two roommates, Parkinson and Crabbe, were almost totally without personalities besides the usual girlish traits and provided only mild reactions to the conundrum. As Hermione cared little for gossip and the merit of boys depending on their family wealth or the scale of their dowries, she had little in common with those two. They seemed eager to leave the dorm as usual, no doubt to find equally socially challenged boyfriends, Goyle and Travers. The remaining three Witches barely noticed their absence.

"Found my new pumps!" Macbeth exclaimed from the toilet stalls.

Hermione couldn't help her pinched expression once the puzzle pieces came together, grateful as she was for this distraction. Because all signs pointed to the one group capable of a catastrophe of such proportions...

"What a stonking mess..." Lefay commented. Hermione was surprised when she looked up to find their aloof friend already dressed in her school robes and tie and ready for classes. How she managed such a feat was impressive indeed, with Macbeth on the loose.

"You owe me one," Hermione huffed as she darted to her trunk.

Macbeth was in the showers and they heard her voice as she screeched and shouted, "There are _beetles_ in my hair tonic!"

Lefay shook her head and slipped one perfectly coiffed ringlet behind her ear before surveying Hermione's bird's nest. "Want some help with that, Dumbeldore?"

Hermione snorted, "Why bother when it'll just go back to _this _during Potions?"

"True...But you do have a reputation to uphold."

Hermione glanced at her acquaintance-quasi-friend from beneath her lowered brow. Grimly she held up her right hand and pointed to the ring sitting on her finger. It wasn't a rock, but the Black family crest on her hand said loudly enough what anyone else needed to hear. "Now that I have this, why should I dress to impress anyone?"

Desdemona narrowed her gray orbs and lifted her pointy chin. "You should try to impress _him_, Hermione."

She froze a moment before tugging her stockings up the rest of the way with a light grunt. The dress she wore underneath her outer robes was light and summery, purple as something Uncle Albus might wear. She was particularly fond of this one because she had nicked it from Ariana's trunk over Hols.

"You're right..." she murmured, unwilling to admit it. She did need to impress him, but it was a waste of time. The clocks were all off, or turned backwards and to different settings. She had spent too much time moping in her bed this morning.

"I'd like that in writing, I fancy," Mona softly replied with her usual dry wit.

Hermione met her eyes and smirked before reaching to accept a bottle of Sleekeazy's from Mona's hand. The potion helped tame the nest into something more acceptable, though she didn't bother styling it today, preferring to let it down loose. She could always use a pencil to twist it up later, she thought.

Macbeth had returned from her unsuccessful shower in an even bigger tiff. Her blonde ringlets were dried quickly with a clumsy spell. Somehow, she still managed to fix herself into something resembling an article out of Witches Weekly. "Wilkes is gonna think I'm such a chav!" she sighed and shook her head before applying her usual regime of makeup and potions.

Hermione and Mona exchanged a look. Though they had little chance to speak during the Welcome Feast, especially with Sirius distracting her and the other ladies at Slytherin, both Witches noticed the change in Pervincia. Maybe she noticed more now because of what Regulus had mentioned of his..._initiation_.

But it was obvious that behind her false bubbly and spritely demeanor, Macbeth was not the same Witch they parted ways with before break. She was making a bully effort to put on a good show, though. They heard plenty of how she and Wilkes went _all the way _at Christmas. She didn't mention Death Eaters, however, or that her boyfriend was now the stamped property of a psychotic Dark Wizard.

"And I told Wilkes, not in a million years! That's your grandmother's diamonds! But he insisted," she perked, stretching out an arm to reveal the flashy bracelet.

Desdemona held her satchel to her chest and lazily disregarded everything else Macbeth had said. "Perv, I need you to run a little errand for me." She pulled a note from the burgundy pouch and grimaced. It was nearly as close to smiling as she came.

Macbeth looked crestfallen in the mirror for a split second, where Hermione could secretly sneak a peak at her. But the moment was fleeting and replaced by her usual flippant flair. "Naturally, I'm the only one capable. Who owes you this time, pet?"

Mona sneered and passed on the branded note, "Snape. And that is really all I can tell you."

Pervincia laughed, "That greasy pauper! How is _he _going to pay you back? With potions?"

"I suggest you shut it before something just as foolish comes out of your mouth, Macbeth."

Pervincia giggled on her way out the dorm. The moment the door clicked shut, Lefay strode up to Hermione, purposefully. Seeing Lefay with that certain look in her eye was never a good thing, and usually preceded some news Hermione wasn't going to fancy. But she lifted her chin, kept her eyes open and expressive and tried desperately not to listen to the voice inside her head panicking.

"You're hiding something important, Dumbledore, and I intend on learning the truth, whether you tell me yourself, or I find it through other means."

Hermione sucked in a sharp breath. Of all things she hadn't been expecting this. "What do you mean?"

Mona's pale orbs narrowed. "I see. The hard way. Very well, for now I won't pry too deeply. But let's just say, I'm not the only one to notice how quickly you've gone from Potter to Sirius Black. Not that he isn't easy on the eyes, or that he has his own charm. But I'm no fool. Anyone can see Potter's madly in love with you and though Black tries to hide it, he's not far behind. That this coincides with his reconciliation with his family may not be as widely known. But as I said before, I have my sources. And Hermione, always remember we aren't like the rest of our sycophantic House Mates. We're self-made and this makes us even more of a threat to people like Voldemort."

Hermione shivered at her words and the mention of the mad man who haunted her waking hours. She could never forget that high pitched cackle or those long, spidery fingers, or those red eyes on a face that should have been devastatingly handsome...

Outwardly, she maintained her cool disposition and forced a smile. "As long as you aren't going to disown me for not choosing _Potter, _I guess I'll have to admit you're right about everything."

"Of course I am," Mona said with a smirk. "But you know how we Slytherins are so interchangeable. I know why you chose Black and in many ways, he really is the better choice. Just, please tell me Black is not intending on spending every meal with us."

"Why do you say that?" Hermione asked, genuinely curious and relieved to have tread back into familiar waters with her strange friend.

Desdemona's white-blonde eyebrow arched over her pale face. "I'd rather eat my meals in peace, not surrounded by the simpering, simple-minded Witches who fawn over him. And I thought it was just a Gryffindor phenomenon..."

"I can't make any promises," Hermione said, laughing as they left the dorm and entered the common room. She turned from Lefay and then gasped to find the very Wizard in question sitting beside his little brother on the couches, surrounded by a score of Snakes and acting as though he'd known them all his life.

_He probably has, _she reminded herself.

And he was already breaking one of Lily's new rules by sitting right next to Regulus. His brother looked less than amused. Were she anyone else, she might have missed the tell-tale signs that the younger Black was actually pleased with this.

Shaking her head, she crossed her arms over her chest and watched them a moment from the corridor.

Sirius grinned up at Travers and several first and second years hoping to be _seen _by the reinstated Black heir. "Don't believe me, Travers?"

"Of course not! The idea is absurd, the Headmaster dueling with _you _for kicks, Black."

Regulus shook his head and piped up, "You don't know Sirius."

"I'll take that as a vote of confidence, little brother," Sirius exclaimed with a quick bark of a laugh as he clasped the younger by the shoulders. "But it's all true, I swear on Salazar's tatty knickers."

One of the Carrows piped up, "Everyone knows you're full of rubbish, Black."

Sirius narrowed his eyes on Alectus. "Just like everyone knows what a bleeding _saint _you and your twin are, yeah? Don't think I forgot what you did at the Malfoy's ball two years back." And like flipping a switch, he banished the underlying threat in his tone to spread his hands to the rest of them. "I tell you gents, I've dueled with the best of them, but having a working wand is only half the trick to attracting bints. You gotta know how and when to swing it," he finished with a wink. The First Years whispered to themselves and Regulus rolled his eyes.

Hermione couldn't help her muffled giggle to escape. It was too rich, watching the House that hated him so much, now hanging off his every word. This was who Sirius was, though, and why, as Mona hinted, he was the smarter choice. For the first time since he had told her he switched places with Regulus, Hermione felt assured and forgot about James Potter.

Because her giggle was enough for Sirius to turn his attention instnatly from the others. His gray eyes flashed as they met her golden orbs.

"What about the match against Ravenclaw? Think they have a shot at beating those Gryffindorks?" a Fourth Year demanded.

Sirius kept his gaze on her and winked briefly as he replied, "Oi! Think I'd steal you the honor of placing your bets? A gentleman never betrays his secrets, mate. But I can tell you this much, Potter is gonna give one hell of a fight."

She smiled faintly and stepped from the corridor. Desdemona had gathered Pervincia once more and looked back to cast her a knowing look before leaving the common room. Hermione sighed and lifted her chin, prepared to play the role Dorea fashioned for her.

Sirius leaped up with ease and vigor. Still keeping his smiling eyes fixed on her, he announced, "And that's my cue, gents! Wish I could stay and chat longer, but duty and a perfect ass await me." He snatched her arm in his, practically jumping to stand at her side as he wagged his eyebrows. Several of the younger Slytherins snickered and the older ones smirked knowingly. Regulus palmed his face wit his hand and Hermione smacked Sirius on the cheek.

His smile faded and his gray eyes flashed with something new as he leaned in closer, almost territorial in front of the rest of her Housemates. For a moment she wondered what he was playing at and even if he were playing. Her brow drew together uncertainly, until his lips twitched up in a smirk as he said, "Careful, Witch." He reached his arm around her to pinch her arse.

Hermione squeaked but her words faded when he leaned in closer, so his breath was against her cheek.

"Don't forget who you belong to, now," he said and cupped her backside firmly with his hand to walk her out of the room. "Watch and learn, Snakes!" he called back to the others.

Hermione clenched her jaw as a flurry of conflicting emotions filled her. A nervous tension itched beneath her skin that made her want to slap and do other things she couldn't allow her mind to ponder as they entered the candlelit hall. She waited until they were at a distance from the other students in the hall before casting a silencing charm wandlessly.

She hissed, "I'm not your little bitch, Sirius Orion Black! Stop treating me as though I were your property."

Sirius simply squeezed her bum in reply and grinned nastily, "But you _are_, Mione, love, at least to _them_. They would suspect something amiss if I didn't stake a claim. Trust me, it's less about degrading you as a Witch and more about sending them a fucking message."

"And what might that be?" she asked, faintly wondering why she was still allowing him to touch her, _down there_.

"Hands off, fuck off, you can pick any number of ways to say it. Simply put, if they touch you that's like fucking with _me_. And now that I have some influence in their eyes, now they know I'll practically _own _half the departments they'll work for, they'll obey."

Hermione reached down to move his hand from her arse to her waist and held his eye. "Are you sure you aren't enjoying this new role a little too much?"

He shrugged and this time his smile was genuine and a bit sheepish. "Might as well enjoy it while it lasts, yeah? Feel free to take advantage of me if you fancy, love. And keep in mind, I like it rough."

Hermione felt the blood rush to her face and other unmentionable places and clung to her ire in return. She would never admit to him she was embarrassed and...turned on. It was impossible, ridiculous and Sirius Black was childish, she reminded herself. But he had distracted her. This she was thankful for. She wasn't ready to face _him _yet. And he had a point.

They had a part to play and already she could envision the ways she was going to repay him for his little stunt in the common room. Secretly though, she was relieved to have someone like Sirius on her side. He was slightly unstable at the best of times due to his upbringing. She could sense the darkness in his magic, much as he tried to mask or hide it. Unlike James, Remus or even Peter, Sirius lived with a different kind of self loathing and personal mistrust. Though they hadn't spoken of it, both of them knew their pasts were intertwined. He'd as much hinted that his family's dark signature had been reeking off her when they took her into the manor. But it wasn't until the past few weeks, when she lost the person she had come to love and trust the most, that she remembered this fact.

For the first time since she woke up in Potter Manor, Hermione felt as if, should she ever remember her past, Sirius was the one she could share it with.

* * *

**Review: _Though this chapter is shorter than my usual run-of-the-mill, it's setting up for the big one coming next! Be prepared for more Marauders, confrontations and confessions and magic lessons._**


	3. Potent Potables & Possession

**A/N: _Writing when I can find the time! My family is going through some difficult stuff right now, thus the lag in updates. To make up for it I've been posting revised chapters of Frozen Dawn for all you Twilight-Jacella fanatics ;)_**

**_Last time...on ATDV:_**

_-The Marauders spiked the House Elves water supply!_

_-Lily Evans is starting a mini-revolution with Hermione as the "Girl Who Lived."_

_-Sirius is taking his role of protector and fiancee perhaps a little too liberally..._

**_Now on with the show!_**

* * *

**Chapter 3**

**Potent Potables & Possession**

* * *

"And today, class, we have an exciting lesson over the deadly effects of Amorentia!" Slughorn exclaimed with a juggle of his round belly. Half the class groaned, that being the male half, while the female Gryffindors and Slytherins turned thoughtful. After all, it couldn't be all bad to learn a little more about a love potion.

Hermione scratched her elbow and her brow crossed with her frustration. She wanted to seeth aloud, but dared not make any obvious remarks.

_This is complete and utter rubbish! We should be learning potions that will enlighten, not hinder us. How he ever became Potions Master..._

Classes had been fruitless and boring so far their first day back. Hermione sometimes caught herself longing for texts she hadn't read yet, things she couldn't recall without meaning to in her mind. She knew most of Slughorn's lesson already, as though she'd read someone's meticulously detailed notes on the subject once before.

Regulus was doing his best to ignore her at her right and she attempted the same. Though every time her eyes surreptitiously sought his, he was staring at her _without _staring, damned Snake. Sirius had made an obvious show for everyone while dropping her off at Advanced Potions, earlier, even going so far as to blow her kisses once he literally carried her into the classroom. She had been mortified but unallowed to show it.

While Sirius had been somewhat agreeable during Arithmancy that morning, he took to playing with her hair and making faces at her behind the Professor's back. Hermione was already in a giggling mood, she was horrified to admit.

Breakfast had been bad enough, what with the plates constantly appearing and disappearing. Socks and underwear and odd items had bedecked the Great Hall. Wobbling House Elves flashed in and out of existence. All the while students were outraged over wardrobe and hygeine malfunctions. Even Sirius seemed somewhat dumbfounded, until Hermione had followed his devastated gaze at his House table.

The Marauders were hunched over together and rolling in fits of laughter, even James. Hermione too felt a slight pang for being out of the loop in this obvious prank. Sirius sighed heavily and simply breathed, "_Bastards took my idea_..."

She felt so guilty for his despair that she held her tongue. Still it _was _funny that the Headmaster actually yelled at an obviously drunk House Elf that kept appearing underneath his pointed hat. Especially when he made careful threats to the culprits while glancing at the suspiciously stoic Marauders. Sirius laughed then and even tickled Hermione until she joined him, distracted Albus' attention from Gryffindor.

Fingers snapped in front of her face and she blinked, then glared at an increadulous Reggie. "C'mon, Dumbledore, we haven't got all day?"

"What are you talking about, Black?" she asked with a superior tilt of her chin for good measure.

Regulus seemed to fight a winning grin before rolling his eyes and standing at their table. "_Fine_, I'll grab the ingredients this time. Really, you should wipe that stupid grin off your face. You don't have to pretend you're in love with my brother, Hermione." he leaned in slightly, palms against the table, elbows bent as he whispered, "Or _is _it an act?"

Hermione hissed long and dug her nails into her palms before shaking her head and studying Slughorn's notes for the latest pointless potion. She shifted her papers and then noticed a parchment that was floating just over her shoulder. She snatched and glanced briefly at the classroom before tearing it open beneath her desk.

_"Meeting me at Headquarters after Dinner._

_L"_

Fighting the urge to look over her shoulder to meet Lily's piercing emerald eyes, she crumpled the paper and silently, wandlessly vanished it.

* * *

Hermione was relieved to escape Advanced Potions without having to deal with Regulus Black. Tucking her books close to her chest, she kept her chin tucked down and sped around her classmates to be the first out the door. She had high hopes that Sirius wouldn't be waiting for her. Upon catching no sight of that familiar mop of longish black hair, she sighed with relief and unconsciously let her magic expand out.

Much like stretching, she loved these brief and rare moments when she could be by herself, even if it was in a hall filled with her peers. The dungeons weren't so terrible as the towers and stair cases, however. And she had every intention of taking advantage of the break before dinner. She was halfway around the corner when she heard an unmistakable voice shout, "Oi! Mione!"

Without looking back to affirm sight of her betrothed, she turned into the first empty classroom she could find. Keeping one arm tight around her books, she awkwardly turned the knob, only to feel the door shoved roughly back into place by an arm in the darkness. Hermione bit back the urge to scream, though she was hoping this was the Bloody Baron or even Jeeves, rather than Death Eaters come at last to claim her.

Her nightmares were always filled with Death Eaters...

Her books fell to the ground with a solid _thump_ and a hard, lean body pressed against her, one around her arms to keep them at her sides and the other hand clapped over her mouth. She could feel his rough breathing behind and against her and couldn't help her trembling. Beyond the door she could hear Sirius calling for her, only to be interrupted by several of the Slytherins he had so easily charmed earlier that morning.

"Black! We have business to discuss with you," a Wizard sounding much like Wilkes said.

Hermione stiffened as she remembered what Lily and Severus said, that he had taken the Dark Mark over break.

Sirius was very close to them now, just outside the door, she thought. And he amazed her with his ability to flip the switch and laugh back at them jovially, "Ah, mate, back for more are we? You should know by now to conduct business first with my associate..." his voice trailed as he followed them a ways away and the clamor of students brushing by interrupted his words.

"Not a word," a voice whispered, grazed against her ear and she felt the vibrations of his chest against her back. Her eyes shot open wildly as she recognized the feel of those muscle bound Quidditch arms, the smell of sky and rain and earth, the way her magic felt so free and at peace. It was _him_ and she was home.

"James," she gasped, feeling a hundred tiny flittering emotions in her chest as she breathed the same air with him, as she drank in the feel of him against her. She had not allowed herself to truly _look _at him since the return to Hogwarts. She _wouldn't...couldn't _bear the evidence of his pain. Feeling his emotions was bad enough. In that moment, she was grateful for the darkness of their hiding place. Her eyes stung and she longed to move to rub the tears brimming, only to feel his grip on her tighten in determination.

"Damn it, Hermione, you're not making this easy," he hissed and his square chin dug slightly into her neck, nestled almost. She huffed impatiently but obeyed, confident he would explain his reasons for kidnapping her and holding her hostage in Slytherin territory. It was a mad gamble, typically irrational of course.

She sighed again and her lips brushed against the calloused skin of his palm. His hand twitched and then slipped to rub against her mouth, trail down her chin and clasp her neck and then dip into the open collar of her shirt. His nose grazed against her neck, buried into her curls where he inhaled long and deep.

"James..." she whispered and hesitated, unconsciously leaning deeper into the easy comfort of his embrace. He was so much taller than her and against her will, images of the last night they were together filtered through her most treasured and painful memories.

"I've missed you so much..." he groaned into her skin, his vice like grip turning into a desperate embrace, where he clung to her like a lost lifeline.

Hermione squeezed her eyes shut tightly, afraid he would push her away again in the following seconds, needing him to do exactly that. But another, lonely and frightened part of her, the broken girl he had picked up and brought inside his home and life, relished in their connection. She could feel everything he was feeling, his misery which ached to a degree that matched her own. His complex tumbling mesh of jealousy, hatred and pain, betrayal, all tightly wound and bound by a love so deep it frightened her. James Potter was like a flame which burned too quickly and too brightly. She feared one day this would cause him to snuff out. Normal people didn't live with this kind of passion their entire lives, let alone each day at a time. James didn't know how to live otherwise. He ate and breathed his love for her, and when she was torn from him, when he pushed her away, it had ripped them both apart.

A small, sensible corner of her brain thought back to the bond the ancient magic had created betwixt them, and she had every intention of resuming her search. Perhaps she could tell Uncle Albus about this, at least...

She moaned when James pressed his open mouth over the pulse in her neck and a hand trailed over her breasts,then dipped lower to reach between her legs. Her thighs clenched instinctively and she was so close to whirling around in his embrace, desperate to throw her legs up and ride him until they were plastered with sweat and drained of energy.

Sensible Hermione arose in abject horror with this realization and spoke through her mouth, in breathless, husky tones. "J-James, we _can't_."

His fingers trailed ever so subtly over her skirt, pressing against the places that drove her mad, in a way that was making her lose sense.

_And we're still fully clothed_, she thought, dismally.

"Fuck it, Hermione," James growled low somewhere along her jawline. "I can't take this anymore. I watched him with you at breakfast...and in the halls." His voice broke and he took a much needed gasp of air before continuing, "And you were _laughing _and smiling like you both meant it. I shouldn't have said any of those things in my letter. I'm a fucking nutter and we both know it. But I'm _yours _and you will always be _mine_, remember?"

"No, not anymore," she said. "James, we're doing this to protect you and me. He won't let anything happen to me."

James flipped her around so quickly her hair flung into their faces and parted over her face with his hand as he pushed her up and against the door. She was pinned against him and his hand was in her hair, his eyes flashing in the dimmest of lights a myriad of amber and dark forest green. The look in his face was just as mad as he claimed to be. But underneath it, she could feel his fear pressing against her like a thick oppressive weight.

"I don't care about that, Hermione. If I knew that was all this was it might be enough for me, knowing you were safe. But every time I see you two together, everything I just told myself fades away and I can't...breathe." He pressed his forehead to hers and her lashes fluttered as his hands roved to caress her hips and her breasts, thumbs slowly circling her covered nipples. She arched into his touch, her body pliant and willing even as she continued to argue.

"Jamie, I love you. I will always need you. But you're so good, _too_ good for me. I'm going to learn what this bond between us is and find a way to counter it. Uncle Albus will help us, I'm sure. I can't do this to you anymore. We can't pretend the rest of our lives. It won't be fair to the people we marry," she rattled on, hating herself and him for making her say the sensible thing. She knew he wouldn't listen and maybe, deeply, she said what she said because of it.

Because James sucked in a breath as though the air had been knocked from his lungs and he shook his head. "Don't you fucking do it. Don't you dare leave me alone. I have to know what you're feeling. How else can I know you still feel something for me? How will I know when you want me to do this..."

Hermione cried out sharply, but her cry turned into a whispered silencing charm and James sighed in triumph at the word. He knew just as surely as she that her resolve had fallen and her decision, however foolish was made.

Her arms snaked up around his neck as he rolled his hips into hers, connecting them at last and she moaned to feel his hard length straining against his pants. She hitched up a leg around him to grind just as roughly back into him and their mouths opened, breaths shuddering in the cold damp underground.

James spoke as his hands lowered and he began to drag her skirt up higher, "Do you want me to touch you, Hermione?"

She bit her lip at the sound of his rarely used gravelly tone and flung her head back against the ancient wood when his fingers grazed her wet cotton underwear. He smirked against her lips.

"I'll take that as a yes." He pushed aside her underwear and then his fingers were grazing, dipping shallowly into her and grazing against her sensitive flesh. "I want you to say it, tell me what you want," he said against her collarbone as he nipped and licked her skin.

Hermione shook her head, though her moans continued to rise in volume and frequency. She was undulating against his hand, but she wanted so much more. She needed _him_, all of him. She arched into him and reached down to stroke the bulge in his pants and smiled to _feel _his pleasure through their bond. They were both so close and she wanted him _now_, damn it.

She undid his zipper and reached past his underpants to pull out his thick manhood. She stroked hard and tight, dragged her thumb against the tip, rubbing pre-cum over his smooth flesh. The smell of sex lay thick between them, coupled with the emotions that were doubled and shared over and again through the magic beating in time to their hearts around them like a living pulse.

He helped lift her as she clamped her legs around his waist and used his shoulders for leverage, the door to steady her as she slid achingly slow over him. Both of them groaned deeply as he stretched her anew and filled her completely. James bit down on the skin just above her breast slightly and she shivered at the sensations washing over them. They stood together like this for several quick, shallow breaths, hip bones grazing her pubic bone. And then, slowly she lowered her lips to his and took his bottom lip into her mouth and lightly sucked.

James came alive at her touch and his tongue plunged in between her lips, grazing every surface as if to memorize her all over again. His strong hands grasped her hips and she parted from him, leaned against the door as he pulled slightly out of her and plunged in again. The door rattled and they shouted as they came to their release, James first with the sweet hot bursts of liquid fire into her center, seemingly deeper she felt. And his pleasure brought her down harder, grazing against her sensitive nerves and her walls clenched and spasmed against his cock, until he found more of himself releasing into her. She dragged every last drop from him and only after their trembling subsided did they both lean against the door, panting, clinging to one another.

For a long moment they said nothing. Hermione felt like it wasn't enough, like it couldn't ever be enough...

"I'm sorry..." he whispered the last thing she had expected to hear from him. Wasn't she the one who should be apologizing?

"James, you don't have to..."

"Yes I do," he cut in, pressing his lips over hers slowly and rolling his hips against hers gently, with promise. "I've pushed you from the moment I met you into this relationship, whatever you might think. Much as I tried to stay away from you, or treat you like a friend, a brother, I just couldn't bear it."

She sighed and rested her forehead against his. "I know."

"I know this doesn't-doesn't _change _anything," he began with a raged breath, where his arms tightened their hold around her waist, "I know you can't break your oath to Pad-to _him_. But I just never want you to forget..." he trailed off, helplessly and she could sense the darker turn of his thoughts.

Ever since their first encounter with Voldemort in Hogsmeade, she had felt a shadow enter James's inner light. He had been so purely good when she first met him. But he was a darker shade of pale now, not gray enough to abstain from honor or the greater good, she knew. Still, she feared between her betrayal and Dorea's failing health, the months ahead wouldn't prove any more healing for James.

She wanted to tell him what he wanted to hear, wanted to promise she would never give herself fully to Sirius and that in a few months, maybe after things died down they could call of their faux engagement.

Instead, she bit her lip and said, "I can't promise you anything, no matter how much I want to give you everything you deserve." She didn't add that in her eyes, by ending their relationship, she _was _giving him the chance to have everything he deserved.

_I'm no good for you. Can't you see that? _

James choked back what sounded like a sob and a laugh. Bitterly, his softer tone gone, he replied, "I should never have listened to Mum when she told me to give you space. I should have proposed to you the first moment I knew I loved you. Now it's too late...too _fucking _late."

She ran her hands up his chest and dug her fists into his wild hair. "Listen to me, James Merlin Potter. I will always be on your side and I will never give up on you or abandon you in my heart. You're my best friend and you give me hope. I don't know what I wouldn't have done if you hadn't found me. Don't you see that I owe you? Let me do this. Let me protect you any way I can."

An empty hole filled her chest when he lowered her to the ground, pulling out of her at last. She stood, numbly as he righted his trousers and stood centimeters before her. So close but something was different. She could barely feel anything off of him and his emotions. It chilled and frightened her and she wondered if she should have said anything. She wondered if they could ever be happy again, without each other.

His hand slipped into hers and she lifted her chin, looking where she knew his eyes to be as he laced their fingers together. "Come, we can wear my cloak to the kitchens. Let's get you something to eat."

She squeezed her eyes shut tightly when his lips brushed over hers and parted from her. "James, we can't. Someone will know I'm missing."

_Thanks to Lily and her little club..._

James's grip tightened and he stood straighter, increasing the space between them. "You mean he'll notice?"

A tiny flame of frustration suddenly ignited in her at his tone. "Yes," she snapped. "_Sirius_, your best mate, will notice we're both gone. He's not stupid. It'll be hard enough to explain why I didn't wait for him just now."

"Why didn't you wait?" James asked with brushes of amusement and something else in his voice as he shifted on his feet.

"I needed some time to myself," she admitted. "Don't act so smug James Potter. We didn't have a row. And you need to talk to him. Sooner or later you'll have to grow up and admit that he did this for both of us."

James let go of her hand. "I know," he answered softly. "I'm just not ready...not yet. I need..."

_Time_.

* * *

James left the abandoned classroom under the cover of his Invisibility Cloak, without Hermione. He never turned back to check if she were in tears. He was too afraid if he saw her in tears then his control would vanish and he'd rush back to her and they'd end up right back where they started. He tightened his fists as he walked through Slytherin's domain and past the Potion's classroom with a Snake-worthy sneer.

_Guess you are half a Black after all,_ he thought snidely.

He had a sudden longing to skip dinner and take a spin out on the Quidditch Pitch, or just _out_, anywhere in the beckoning sky. His limbs ached and tightened with nervous energy. He was too close to what had just happened between him and Hermione to think clearly. He hadn't meant to attack her the way he did. He'd been watching her, spent much of his free period trying not to think of her and failing dismally. Not even the perfect reaction of the school to their greatest prank yet had lightened his dark mood. He'd ended up outside her classroom without realizing it.

_Her skin was so soft, like velvet or the clouds..._

The bond between them, the thing _he _was responsible for existing between them, was constantly drawing him to her, wherever she was. He wondered absently whether it would work over great distances, should he ever have need to find her.

_She panted his name with his every thrust, and he had wanted to burst with agony and joy knowing this must but couldn't be the last time..._

He doubted Sirius would let her out of his sight, he forced himself to acknowledge. He could only hope Moony hadn't been looking at the map anytime in the last hour. Otherwise he'd have some serious explaining to do.

James scowled at the few students lurking the corridors rushing to make their way to the Great Hall. He envied them all for their innocence. Because most of them weren't aware that the world outside these grounds was going to shit. And there was nothing he could do about Hermione or Sirius or the Slytherins she lived among. That was Padfoot's problem now, he told himself.

But the feel of her breath against his, her hands wrapping desperately and perfectly around him...

_Godric's tatty knickers! _

James headed for the kitchens, knowing he wasn't fit for much socializing this evening. After he burgled something to eat, he thought of his broom and the towers where most students didn't dare climb. He had climbed them all and flown through their maze on nights like this, when the world seemed to press around him until he couldn't breathe anymore.

His throat ached painfully as he fought back down another memory of her. He wanted to rush back the way he came and beg for her to let him take care of her. He'd been doing nothing but since he found her in front of his home. James realized, after the months since she'd been in his life since, he didn't know how to function otherwise.

_If she won't let me near her then I'll have to protect her some other way_, he decided.

Albus hadn't been exactly pleased with him after he learned about the engagement between Sirius and Hermione. James knew it was because his godfather had another match in mind for his niece. Much as James knew what he was getting himself into, going to his Godfather the night after Sirius and Hermione left Potter Manor, he had gone still. But he had been surprised to find half a dozen other Witches and Wizards already waiting at Dumbledore's home. He recognized all of them, having seen them around his parents or at various functions at one time or another.

He realized then this was the organization his father often whispered about. The Order of the Phoenix. Albus was furious with him for arriving unannounced, but calmed once he saw how upset his godson was. That is, until he learned what he'd done.

Hermione wasn't telling him anything he hadn't heard already, when she told him to grow up. He was trying to do just that, _damn it_, but moderation had never come easily for him. And not having her at his side made him anxious, half himself, empty.

He had begged Dumbledore to let him join the Order, that night.

_"I'm a liability now, aren't I? You can't afford to _not _let me in," _he'd insisted.

Predictably, his godfather had given a cryptic answer in turn, _"Can we afford to let you in, James? Our numbers are few but steadily growing. I have feared for some time that we would have to recruit younger. For every new member it seems another falls. I must ask you, do I have the right to allow you into the hell we're trying so desperately to keep you from?"_

_"Albus, I'm already involved, more deeply than any of you are aware. And after tonight, you know I'll just go looking for trouble if you don't let me join."_

In the end, he'd won. James rarely lost an argument or a debate. His logic while always tainted by emotion was sound and convincing. And his godfather realized it was indeed wiser to keep him close, than to let him free to raise his own brand of hell.

James wasn't an official member of the Order, but he spent the rest of Christmas break hovering around their meetings and sharing what he could of the inner gears of his Death Eater classmates. He didn't tell them that Voldemort had singled he and Hermione out and that they'd already faced him and defied him. And he didn't tell them his real reason for wanting to join.

He burst into the Head Boy and Girl dormitories and was pleased to find it empty. Evans had spent little time there since term began and he found the silence gave him time to think. When Moony and Wormtail weren't crashing in, that is. He wrote a note on parchment and pointing at it with his wand, thought of his godfather while it vanished from his hand.

He didn't wait to head for the Headmaster's office. Dumbledore would meet him there soon as he read the message. And if everything went according to plan, he soon wouldn't have time to think about Hermione anymore.

* * *

**Review: **_What is James going to see Dumbledore about, do you think? What does Lily want to see Hermione for? All this and more in the next chapter. Thanks for all your reviews! And sorry again for the delay. I'm trying to work on this as much as I can manage. :)_


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